Special thanks to /u/lmn for filling in for our vocalist and making it thousand times better! (He's the anchorman)
and /u/Dundent for "what the fuck, Is that John Mayer?"
[Indistinct conversation about john mayer in a TV show and the reddit parody . audience laughs along]
John Mayer’s on a spree
Oh, the savagery
He wants to cut you down
The urge to make you bleed
He’ll strangle you in your sleep
You’ll never know, what fuels this man
With all the hate his heart can stand
To dream of ways to tear your life away
No shred of humanity
But he does it so soulfully
How can that be
He’ll rearrange your vertebrae
Bring out the blades to shred and flay
Still craving more, he’ll bring you to your grave
what the fuck,
Is that John Mayer?
John fucking Mayer with a chainsaw!!
Paramedics now reporting four dead in Montana after singer-songwriter John Mayer went on a killing spree in a family oriented resturant earlier today. Eye witness reports claim Mayer "had a complete meltdown", hacking several innocent bystanders to death with his fork, after having listened to a parody of one of his songs created for long-running songwriting contest Game of Bands. That was a dick move, John Mayer. Mayer reportedly fled the scene after the incident, and was heard "laughing maniacally".
As Mayer continues to elude police in Montana, he is believed to be armed and extremely dangerous. Public is advised to avoid all contact and to report any sightings to their local police department.
WHAT THE FUCK
I will kill you